The A,B,C's of Bottoming!

Anal sex can be something that is really pleasurable if done correctly.

There have been men who come in for coaching that end up telling me that they fantasize about being penetrated, but when it comes time to actually perform it the only thing that comes up is anxiety.

I can totally relate. I spent many years as a gay man in the top role until I realized that all I needed to do was to just relax, breathe and really take in pleasure of the act. That said, I had to learn something about my anatomy.

Here are two videos about the Anal anatomy and another about Sphincters.

So lets get to the ABC's of Bottoming.

A is for Anal Awareness.

It's so important to understand the structure of the anal area. It is an area that, if you decide you want to insert something inside it, you have to practice first. I would suggest starting in a relaxed place, possibly taking a warm shower, so you can feel that you can work with it and feel clean. That is a big source of fear for men, that they will not be clean down there. We will get to that in a bit.

Understanding the anus means really being aware that we have two connecting sphincters, they do the same function (regulating openings and closing) but they go about it in different ways. The external sphincter can be controlled voluntarily. Then we have the internal sphincter, It is involuntary; it's like blood pressure or heartbeat, it has a mind of its own!

Once you get past those two you will find the puborectal sling, which is a strong ring of supportive

muscle that creates a curve in the rectum (the S curve), which creates a situation if a penis can hit the anal wall perpendicularly. The whole area is called the puborectal region and is only used to things going out of it, so when something is inserted, it wants to shut down tightly.

So if you think of three points that may cause pain for you if you are inserting something (in this case a nice cock) you will have issues with the internal sphincter, the puborectal sling and the puborectal region. You may have rushed or weren't ready and felt the tightening or pain of one of these and that could cause you to not want to bottom. Its important to know your anatomy.

B is for Breath

Yes. Practice breathing in order to relax the body.

Here is a video on finding your kegel muscles. Working with breath and the kegels can strengthen the puborectal muscles and also breathing can help with relaxing the internal sphincter.

Here is another video of a man teaching how to breathe.

So, practice breathing to relax the body, your asshole will be grateful for it.

C is for cleanliness.

Many men have this fear of having an accident while bottoming. Well, there can be a lot of things to think of to assist you with having some anal radiance.

First off, be mindful of diet. Eat foods that are high in soluble fiber: bananas, apples, brown rice and white beans. Also, try to take some probiotics or psyllium husk. Remember to just be aware of what you are sticking in your body because eventually it has to come out!

Next step is about actually cleaning the internal cavity. Something to remember is that you don't need to shove tons of soaps or cleaners up there. A simple technique is just warm water, not too cold, not to hot. Using enema bulbs, enema attachments for the bathtub are great, but even for newbies who are still getting their ass used to inserting water up in there you can even use an ear syringe. Its important to always use a soft tipped syringe. Insert gently, squirt lightly. Retain the water in the cavity, repeat until things look clear. It's probably a good idea to do this all near a toilet, then jump in the shower and get yourself ready for the play!

A clean ass is so helpful to feel relaxed when there is any kind of anal play. From just exploring with a finger or toy, to having a cock inside.

I also feel that C stands for Consent.

It is so important to know that when engaging in anal play with another person, it is best to feel comfortable, safe and to be able to ask your partner to respect your limits. There is nothing more sexy than a man that can really speak up and let his sexual partner know what does or doesn't feel good.

So go on and explore and have fun with bottoming!

Books to check out: How to Bottom without Pain or Stains , How to Bottom like a porn star , The Bigger Bang

Want more information about anything anal?

Check out JoJo Bear at www.metamorphicembodiment.com

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